Reunion

Ram sat on the window sill contemplating what to do, while trying to keep his mind from screaming in panic. It first started as a mere irritation, turned into a bit of anger and slowly metamorphosed into the panic that was beginning to gnaw at every cell in his body. He suddenly felt so helpless, so small, so….in need of her.

Today was Wednesday, when Geetha had her weekly meetings, hence came home after 7pm. It was Ram’s duty to make sure that he came home early to take care of little Sid. The barely five yet child came home from school at 2, stayed in the neighbor’s house with another kid his age till about 5, when Geetha would pick him up from there as she came back home from office. That was the routine everyday, except on Wednesdays. That was Ram’s day. He knew that the child loved these days when, to give him and himself a break from routine, father and son would go to the beach, eat ice cream, talk about the day and after several attempts at restraining the little boy, the father would let him play in the sand and hold his hand while he shouted in glee as the waves came gushing forth in all their glory.

That was probably the only time that Ram smiled. His relationship with Geetha was going nowhere. The love they had shared before marriage and the few years after marriage seemed like a dream. Geetha was busy with her work, barely had time for him, in fact, barely had time for herself. It had been years since they spent time together, just them. Where did all the love go? Marriage was supposed to be a fulfillment of love, not its strangulation. Did he love her? Did she love him?

Stop! This wasn’t the time to shed tears about a stumbling marriage. Sid was missing and Ram was panicking. He picked up his cell phone and called Geetha.

“Geetha, can you come home immediately?”

“Ram, I am just about to wrap the meeting, can’t this wait?”

“Listen….it’s about Sid. He is missing.”

Silence.

“I’ll be right there."

***

Geetha fought many things at the same time. Anger, frustration, panic, helplessness and tears. How could Ram be so careless? Where could Sid have gone? Was he kidnapped? Was he safe? He loved watching the vehicles go zip past on the roads…was he..NO!!NO!She had to stop these pessimistic thoughts. She quickly parked her bike and came running up the two floors, too impatient to wait for the elevator.
Sid, Sid. Her only child. Her only hope. Her only reason to still be in this marriage. What will she do?? God! Please let him be safe. Please.

***

Ram stood behind Geetha as she and the neighbor tried to cajole information out of Sid’s little friend. All that they could make out was that they had begun playing hide-and-seek and while he was still counting, Sid went and hid somewhere and now it was time for homework, so if they saw him, could they please tell him that the game is over and that Sid has to be the catcher tomorrow?

Ram could literally feel the panic waves from Geetha hit him, as he was sure; the vibes from him were hitting her. He was so thankful when she had walked into the room. He literally heaved a sigh of relief, like they had almost found Sid. Geetha was here, things were bound to take a positive turn now. He was grateful to her for not blaming him or jabbing him with acerbic accusations. He wanted to cry, it was his mistake. He should have been here by 5; the damn Union and their bloody damn stories about bad management. He had stuck around to talk to some colleagues and by the time he reached the neighbor’s house to pick Sid up, it was almost 6.30. It was his fault Sid was missing now and it was terribly decent of Geetha not to mention it.

After searching the vicinity and talking to few more people. Geetha and Ram went to the school, informed the staff in charge that Sid was missing, went to the local police station, lodged a complaint, gave Sid’s recent picture and description and came back home.

The silence was overwhelming. The grief, palpable. They both sat on the sofa, each lost in their own thoughts. Ram’s were as much about Geetha as they were about Sid. She was so beautiful.Inside out. It seemed like motherhood had only made her more charming. She was staring at the tea table. Her shoulders slumped, head hung, eyes glazed. She was so sad, so hurt. And it was all his mistake. He was the reason Sid was missing. He was the reason the marriage was slumping.

He had begun spending more and more time at office. For the Union. He was a smart, successful individual and everyone came to him for advice. Slowly, he had a following and soon he was giving speeches and fighting elections. He was now the Deputy General Secretary of the Union and it was almost a given that he would be the next General Secretary. Coming home late, going out of station for days in a row, sometimes weeks, until one day Geetha told him that enough was enough, and in case he forgot, they had a child and Wednesdays had to become Ram’s days. He started the crack and his indifference to the widening was only making it wider.

He got up from the sofa, walked up to Geetha and sat beside her. She didn’t even stir. He felt so awkward. But it was his doing and the undoing had to be his too. The days before their marriage, he couldn’t keep his hands and eyes off her. Her soft supple skin, her beautiful eyes, her melodious voice, her glorious hair, her sweet lips…oh, how he missed her, how he loved her. It was as if all the lights had been switched on, as if all the dams were broken and the waters gushed out. He put his arms around her and hugged her. God, it had been so long since they had hugged. He gave her the bear hug that she loved. Held her close to him as she sobbed, wept her heart out and hugged him back. He held her as his tears fell on her neck. As he said a thousand sorrys’ to make up for the lost years. Sid was their unification. He was the result of their love. How could they, who loved Sid so much, have drifted apart? It was downright silly for two people to love their child so much and not love each other. He loved her and told her so. She sobbed as she told him that she loved him too.

The bell rang. Wiping their tears, the reunited lovers rushed to the door. It could be the police, could be anyone. God, let it be Sid. Please.

And there she was, their neighbor. WITH SID!!! The earth would never have witnessed a scene so full of joy and love as Geetha wept and picked up Sid in her arms, held him close to her bosom and kissed him a million times. Ram, let the child be with the mother and hugged them both and kissed them. There were tears in his eyes. The neighbor apologetically narrated the tale of hide and seek which the two children had decided to play; and Sid, of all the places had decided to hide in the almirah, and fell asleep!! At about 8pm, when the family had sat for dinner, there was a loud cry from the bedroom and a totally freaked out neighbor and her husband ran to discover the origin of that scream! And lo and behold! It was the lost child!

After many grateful handshakes and thank you s, the small family stood inside and said a prayer of thanks to the Almighty.

Geetha and Ram had gotten their child back! The child had gotten his parents back. Really. It was a divine reunion!

Time to love again.

She had never believed in fate. It never appealed to her, to think that something else, someone else held control over her life, her joys and sorrows. If she cried, it was because ‘she’ had done something not right and if she laughed, it was because ‘she’ had found it funny. There were only two words in the depths of her heart. That place where very few are allowed to enter. ‘I’ and ‘me’. It wasn’t like she was a selfish girl; on the contrary, she gave a lot to charity, in secret. But in the waking hours of her life, there was only one person she was concerned about, and that was her.

But what was happening to her now was a cruel, very cruel work of fate. She bit her tongue as she said the forbidden word in her mind. But what else could it be, if not the work of someone ‘out there’ who had a very silly sense of humor. She shook herself. No, she cannot let herself be confused like this. Tonight was going to be a difficult night and she needed all her senses intact, if she were going to make it through the night, in one piece.

At 7.00 pm, she slowly walked up to the door of a beautiful and cozy looking bungalow. The path was cemented, flanked by big pebbles from the ocean, which was barely a few meters away. She could even hear the heaving waves, the ocean pregnant with a power no one could fathom. So violently calm. A state of being not too different from hers. She stood still outside the door, took a deep breath and rang the bell.

And it seemed like all hell broke loose.

There were two Labradors and two other little things, which amidst the blur of pink tongues, and one fawn and one black lion-dog, she realized were two little girls. And if they weren’t wearing different clothes, she would have fainted thinking she was seeing double.

“OH NO!!! Rhe, I am so terribly sorry!!!” was some voice in the distance and as she slowly got to her feet, associated it with the face. It was Anne. Every time she saw this woman, she felt peace. She simply hated it.

After admonishing the two little brats and the two dogs, Anne led Rhe to the drawing room amidst profuse apologies. “Don’t worry about it, I am alright.” Rhe said, feeling just the opposite. While she was still making sure that Rhe was alright, they heard a THUD from the rooms above. And apologizing again for the twin’s misbehavior, she ran upstairs to find out, what item in the house needed repair or replacement, now.

And that’s when he entered the room. There was some grey around his temples, a little weight around the middle, but he was what she had always known him to be. The most handsome man she had ever come across. The only man she had ever truly loved.

She thought she was going to pass out again.

When Rhe first met Anne, it was a terribly humid day in the streets of Thailand. She was there on business purposes and was taking some time out to de-stress. “Nothing like watching the locals trying to sell you fried cockroaches” her friend had told her and anyways, she wanted to pick up some inexpensive souvenirs.

And all of a sudden, it started pouring. Everyone scrambled under the makeshift tents that doubled up as shops and mobile restaurants. And there was one lady, who was definitely Indian, brown skin, tee and jeans and a tiny red bindi. She had dropped her bag and was busy picking up the tomatoes and the greens in the pouring rain. Rhe didn’t give a damn, but after a few minutes, she felt compelled to help a fellow Indian. So she rushed into the rain to help her pick up the vegetables. And later, over a gratitude coffee that Anne had insisted on, Rhe had found out that Anne had been in Thailand for the past ten years, had a family and worked part time as an English teacher at a local school.

“Wait a minute, I might just have a photograph of my family, let me show it to you!”

Her eyes shone as she rummaged through her purse and pulled out her pride of the moment. Two dogs, two kids her and 'him'.

That’s when Rhe almost passed out, the first time.

***

“It’s been a long time Rhe.”

That voice. It hadn’t changed one bit. Just like those eyes, that face. Like him.

Above them, there was a voice reprimanding the twins. Below, there was a tension so palpable, it could be touched.

“Yes Matt, it’s been a long time. Ten years to be precise. How have you been?”

“I have been good Rhe. Life has been kind to me. You haven’t changed at all. You look just as fabulous as you were ten years ago.”

Rhe smiled. His charm was still intact. She walked up to the couch and sat; more to make sure she didn’t fall, than to make herself comfortable. Despite the hot weather, Rhe suddenly felt cold. This was a scene she had hoped with all her might she wouldn’t have to deal with. Had hoped she would someday come across.

When Matt had wanted to marry Rhe, she was just about getting started on her career. She loved him, but couldn’t marry right now. But Matt was getting older and was under a lot of pressure from his ageing parents. So by mutual agreement, they broke up. Rhe had been the supportive lover. Told him that everything will be alright, for him. Cheered him on and told him that they would remain friends forever. Then they shook hands and went their ways. That night, the entire night, Rhe cried. That was the last time she cried. And loved.

She looked at Matt. The man she once loved with all her heart, wanted to spend the rest of her life with. How things change..

“I haven’t forgotten you Rhe.”

She was jolted out of her reverie. Neither had she. She still loved him. Held on to him in her mind. The memories were getting fuzzier, but they were there. She could never imagine herself loving another man. Matt was her love and in a decision ruled by foolishness, she had let him go. She had thought that she would get over it, that time would heal. It had, in a sense, until now. When every pain was torn open and her heart was aching as agony speared.

“Your children are so beautiful Matt.”

And suddenly, Matt’s countenance changed. He began talking about the girls. There was a glow on his face, a joy that surpassed his voice and permeated right out of his aura. He told Rhe about how Anne almost died giving birth to the babies, how they were born Siamese, joined by their little fingers, how they had to perform a surgery on the infants, how Anne took care of the children, how he and Anne would spend sleepless nights getting the children to sleep, how during the Tsunami, they had just returned from the beach, the previous evening and the twins got so scared watching the news, that they were ill, how .........Anne…twins…Anne…children…Anne…the girls…

He spoke like he was in a trance.

A trance of love so deep, so full, so different. And Rhe knew, that Matt only 'still remembered' her. He didn’t love her. At least not like he used to. His life was full now. He had found love again. Twice, Anne and the twins. There was no denying it. Rhe had truly lost Matt.

But she had found herself.

Caught in the pitch darkness of a lost love, Rhe had closed herself to the world. She had denied herself, friends, family, fun. A sort of self inflicted penance for choosing ambition over Matt. She could have married him then, but she was selfish. But things happen. People move on. Matt had moved on.

Anne came down with two very subdued twins and equally subdued Labradors. They came slowly to Rhe and with hung heads, said “sorry” in unison, Rhe took them both in her arms. And she cried. Like she had cried that night, when she had said no to Matt.

It was catharsis time. It was time to be healed.

Anne’s eyes were bloodshot as she said goodbye to Rhe. There was so much crying. Matt telling Anne that ‘this’ was the girl he had told her about . And Anne, sharing in Rhe’s pain, crying with her. Rhe knew she might meet the family again, or might not. But she was unburdened now. She was clear and changed.

The ocean swirled in front of her. The full moon sending out waves of peace and tranquility. Matching her inner state.

Rhe had moved on. After ten long years, she had moved on.

She was ready to love. Again.

Chinaman Hu

He was tall. He reached up to the heavens. Everyone looked up to him, like he was God or something. I saw him from a distance. There was something about him that drew women to him like magnets. He would smile politely, joke lightly and move on. Never allowing their passes or their open invites to rest on him. I saw the look on the faces of those women. Imagining how it would be if they were in his arms, giggling in groups, discussing what they would do to him ‘when’ he agreed. I would smile at their girlishness. A dismally small number wondered if he were homosexual. “No way” the rest of them said, someone like him, who could make the knees of any girl go jelly, he could never be gay. There was so much excitement about him. The way he walked, the way he observed people, the way he stared at his laptop while he worked. It left the women gaping and wanting.

I always watched from distance. I was small before him, in stature, in everything. There were no men lining up to get a word with me, there were the bare minimum passes and comments which very bored young men threw past me. I ignored everything. It didn’t matter. I noticed his purposeful strides, the way he focused on what he was doing. I felt so incredibly drawn to him. I knew nothing about him. Yet, I knew him. I was scared to ask around. And the kind of people I was with, well, they never bothered discussing anything with me, why would they discuss something as personal as this. I wanted to know his name, to call him by it, to talk to him, to have him smile at me. I think I loved him.

I called him Chinaman Hu. Chinaman because, he had a Hero pen always pinned on his shirt; I noticed that, because I was crazy about Hero pens, always carried one with me, wherever I went. So he was my Chinaman H, but since I didn’t know his name, I called him Chinaman Who which eventually turned, Chinaman Hu!

One day, I was sitting beside the Lake and was lost in thought. Even the swans got bored of me, the bread I had gotten them was over and now they went back into the lake to look for more exciting lunch options.

“Do you feed them everyday?”

I jumped as the voice came from right behind me. In my start, I let go of my books and they fell to the ground. And my heart stopped beating. Chinaman Hu bent down to lift my books and give them to me. I could have been born tongue-less. There were no words that came out of my mouth. As he stood there apologizing to have startled me like that, I managed a barely audible,

“Yes, I feed them everyday.”

He smiled. And the smile that I had only seen from distance became so real to me. The way his eyes crinkled and shone, the way his cheek dimpled…I had to stop staring at him with an open mouth. Then he started talking about animal behavior and how by feeding them everyday, I was actually penetrating their fear of humans and if I continued doing it, they might even forget that I was human and bond like I were another swan.

I just stood there nodding.

Perfect weather. It was almost like the heavens were bestowing their abundant climatic grace upon me. There was a slight breeze. His hair fell over his forehead and as he pushed it away, I noticed that he had only four fingers. As my eyes fell on his fingers, sadness came over his eyes. He looked away. I don’t know where I got the strength from, but I reached out and touched the place, where there should have been the ring finger.

“What happened?” I asked.

“I am a vet. Happened during one of our rescue missions, the poor dog had been tortured by his owner. He was so scared and so defensive. I don’t blame him, he is my pet now.”

I looked lovingly at him.

“You are really a nice person” I said.

And he smiled down at me, again. The sadness had passed. It was time for me to leave, as I looked around for my books and my bag, I noticed that my pen was missing. I began searching for it, patiently first, frantically later. Chinaman Hu watched with interest and then started helping me look for it, between explanations of, beautiful, green and Hero pen. We never found it. I was heart broken. It was one of my favorite pens. As I was about to leave, Chinaman Hu pulled out the pen from his pocket and gave it to me. It was blue, beautiful and Hero.

“Cant be the same thing, but keep it.”

Despite my denials, he insisted I keep it for the day and could return it tomorrow afternoon when I came to feed the swans. It sounded like a deal and I left. The loss of the pen ebbing out, as the joy of the prospect of seeing Chinaman Hu again filled my entire being.

“I have to find out his name tomorrow” I thought!
***
“What are you looking all smug and happy about?” Rina asked as her brother came into her room with a grin plastered across his face as he avoided hitting the door frame.

“I spoke to Chinagirl Hu!!!!!!” he said.

I am meeting her tomorrow by the lake!!!”